I have always been proud of my accomplishments: excelling in school, being part of the foundation of Starbucks' success, running a successful 15-year consulting business, creating a great marriage, raising two amazing young men. This year, when I decided to quit working, I realized just how much of my self-worth is tied up in this "accomplishing." For almost a year now, I've not contributed to our family financially, and with my kids in their teens, my mommying has been less in demand as well. Who am I if I'm not producing?
I was sure that I was destined to do "something big"--whatever that means. It didn't necessarily mean fame and fortune, although those themes definitely wove in and out of my dreams, but it did mean doing something significantly world-changing. Something all could see, point to, and recognize as a "wow, that really changed the world" contribution. Now that I'm reaching mid-life, I'm beginning to wonder if that's my destiny (notice I say, "beginning to wonder"...I haven't let go of that dream yet).
Instead, I am wondering if we can recognize those "something bigs" when they occur, because I think most of the time, we can't see them until we look back. Steve Jobs is a great example of someone changing the world right before our eyes, but it took place over many years, in small steps, and over a tumultuous course, so it wasn't always easy to recognize. What strikes me now, is how much each of us changes the world each day, simply by living our lives.
It is impossible for us to know the lives we have touched, what small act or gesture, what conversation, touched someone and altered their path. Does the pebble know the course of the ripples it created upon being tossed into the pond? If I had one wish for every human being on the planet, it would be for each of us to know that our lives, no matter how small, have impacted more people than we can imagine. If each of us could fathom our greatness and the extent to which we impact others, our words might be sweeter, our eyes softer, our hearts bigger.
Living a life of purpose, to me, means knowing that I don't have to produce to have impact. I just have to be. I have to be present. In each moment, I can strive to bring my best self so I don't miss out on the opportunity to do "something big"--share a smile, bring an open mind, open a loving heart. I may not make the history books, but then again, some small thing done in the moment, might just change the course of history. It's worth a shot.
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